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If you don’t have a good or positive experience to build on, go in with no expectations.“The biggest thing that I see causing dating anxiety in clients is expectation — expecting that someone will be like an ex, that great one that got away or in the alternative, that the new person that your are meeting will be like that one that you were glad to get away from,” Jeanie Winstrom, Couples Expert at Talkspace tells Bustle.“Look at the entire dating experience as a way to meet new people.“You have many people to choose from and you can't mess anything up that is mean to be.”Thanks to the world we live in, one factor causing dating anxiety is our inability to delay gratification.
The end of the night is always so awkward, how should I end it? In order to help ease anxiety it’s all about simplifying the process.
So there’s really no reason to dwell on the things that you may not be so proud of.
“People think way too much into first dates as if it were a trip down the aisle! This has to work out, I'm at the age where I need to settle down and have kids. So, when we slow down our breathing, we actually activate the calming system.
”Here’s a list of anxiety-causing thoughts that tend to race though a lot of our minds during those first dates, according to Ventura: Will they be attracted to me? Because of that, we're able to think and respond more clearly and rationally than if we were in a distressed state where we would need to react impulsively to survive.“Everyone has something great about them — whether they are kind, funny, friendly, knowledgable about space, a huge animal-lover, and the list goes on and on,” Grimste says.
In addition to that, it’s important to also focus on the positive aspects that can come from that particular dating experience.
“If you both get along, this could be the start of a great relationship.
Other times, they’ll project their worries onto the future, i.e. “It can also be good to practice visualizing your date going well and to do some deep breathing so that you go into your relaxed nervous system instead if your fight and flight one.”“I think dating anxiety is often related to fear of rejection, especially based on appearance,” clinical psychologist specializing in body image and relationship issues, Alexis Conason, Psy. “All of this breeds a lot of anxiety around dating, rejection, and appearance-based evaluation.
Comments like those that Trump has made in the media recently don't help the situation.”One of the best ways to get over dating anxiety is to go on an activity date, Dao Nguyen, founder and CEO of How About tells Bustle.
Try to relax and enjoy the process and smile and have fun.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating